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13:29 | reply to this comment Not always submissive While the submissive woman is an undeniable turn-on to me, the dominent woman is just as exciting. Some men (like me) enjoy both types. It is a great find to meet a woman who is confident enough to play both roles and enjoy them for what they are worth. The excitement is not the same in each case. Having a woman submit to whatever devious plot I might impose is a pleasure rooted in my own self worth and confidence. If I have had a very hard day and suffered the many rude and selfish customers we all see from time to time, having someone be submissive is a relief to the nervous system. It puts me back in the driver's seat. Makes one whole again! To answer your question, I did not mean either of those things, I just meant that the two individuals have to be broadly in agreement, whatever that might mean for the individual couple. For some, it might mean a more overtly equal relationship; for others, it might mean one prevailing or being generally in control. As long as they agree, I don't see a problem. I think that when people feel free to be themselves, they are more likely to develop or retain a fun, exuberant attitude to life that minimises bad feeling and conflicts. by Sarah Cavendish on 2004 Jul 15 - 22:55 | reply to this comment Re: Who Says you have to be submissive? Who says that if you want a dominant man, you have to suppress your dominant side and be submissive?!